The Superhero likes to play pirate.
Pirates are third on the totem pole of pretend but that’s pretty high for a three year old.
And now there are real pirates doing real pirating and causing a real stink for the pretend pirates of the world. And that makes me sad.
And it makes me upset on a number of levels.
First. Because these actual pirates are killing and causing general mayhem against the world at large. It pisses me off. (to put it lightly) Get a real job like the rest of us.
Second. I truly get gung-ho “kill ’em all” whenever anyone brings up the fact that these pirates are targeting US ships just trying to sink them. And that makes me embarassed. Which pisses me off.
Third. I also get all crazy patriotic and try to figure out how the hell they think choosing the US as an enemy is a good idea when they are little bittle pirate crews and then I shout “Haven’t they ever heard of a little thing called the NAVY!?!?!?”. And that makes me ashamed. Which pisses me off even more.
So, I ask that these real pirates please stop ruining the fun of being a pirate for the little boys of the world. (oh and stop being general assholes) So that I will stop flinching when the boy declares –
“Look mama I’m a pierit!”
It’s all about me.